Hi Belinda,
You have a lovely name.
Yes, releasing may mean crying and lots of it, it is cleansing. It does seem in the beginning that things get 'worse' before it gets better. You are opening up the closets of where these beliefs have been hidden and locked away for awhile. This is the stage where you may feel deep rage and anger as well towards ones whom have deeply hurt you.
You will not reinforce any beliefs if you allow yourself to feel them fully and let them pass through, step back and see where these beliefs originated from and give them back to the nothingness or void from where they came. I say void because they did not exist until we put a 'face' or circumstance on them.
And then, we curl up inside from the wound and when it is not allowed to be fully expressed and felt in the moment (fear as in embarassed to be real with ourself or told to stop expressing, etc...) we carry it with us throughout the years. All the while we tend to draw our life picture from these hurtful places and color our picture of our life from this pain or shades of gray as I call it. We are magnets of our beliefs, our subconscious feelings.
This is one reason I see that when we say we are 'trying' to change our thoughts we still see no changes happening around or outside of us yet. We haven't dug deep enough into ourself to the root cause and there is still residue. Seeing it this way, gives us the ability to view what does rise as a gift in disguise, because once we get comfortable with allowing the stuck stuff to rise and be released, we know when and if anything like this shows up, it is saying, you don't need this either, let it go, it is causing you to feel pain and separated from yourself. And anything that has the ability to make you feel this way is usually due to keeping or holding to another's opinions of you as your own. It is their opinion and their opinion reveals more about them and their fears. Refuse ownership of another's fears. It doesn't validate who you really are. You are in there Belinda, trust me.
I will be honest and say, it may take awhile, be patient with yourself in the process, some beliefs have been in there for a long while, don't stop or give up on the process, keep on going for you, it does get easier, and it does 'sink' in. I encourage you to do mirror work that Louise Hay is known for. It is wonderful to be able to see for yourself where you are with yourself. And your confidence will grow as you remove the old weeds and make room for the God Seed you are to flourish and grow. You will be restoring your Self Power through Self Love and Self nurturing.
While it is simple, easy? well, depends on how deep these beliefs are rooted and it takes awhile to make the connection that I am creating my life from my own thoughts. No one can think your thoughts for you truly.
I highly recommend Louise Hay's books (You Can Heal Your Life) and her little affirmation cards to carry around with you to uplift you and shift your thinking, one step by one step. It is the way out of your current beliefs. One by one.
Being willing to release resistance to change is the beginning, Life will bring to you what you need to do and know, if you will begin to be willing to trust it once again.
Willingness to change first, then awareness of what is causing the pain, and then releasing it, and of course this is where forgiveness comes in. We do not have to know how to forgive, just be willing to forgive, to get yourself free from being held prisoner to your past.
Your understanding will grow towards others as you grow in your understanding of yourself. You will find yourself viewing them as being frightened children too whom got stuck in their own fears and did not know how to get unstuck, so they passed them onto you and others. They did the best they could do with what they knew how to, like we all do in the moment. Healing happens in the Present moment and we heal our pasts by releasing it and doing this will create a beautiful and bright future, because our current thoughts are what is shaping our next moments or tomorrows.
My heart and Love are with you Belinda truly. Yes, you can do this and the best thing in the world is to do this for yourself. I look forward to hearing from you as you move through the process.
Be Blessed, Be Well,
Love embracing you and supporting you,
Julia
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